


It's okay

by RipJawWolfFang



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst, Bit of Fluff, Dark, M/M, Red Templars, Snow, Wounds, hurt comfort, sorry about this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-25
Updated: 2017-02-25
Packaged: 2018-09-26 19:17:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9917891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RipJawWolfFang/pseuds/RipJawWolfFang
Summary: Sometimes goodbyes are the hardest part





	

Slipping on ice and sleet, having his calves soaked through as the snow melted from the contact, ice clinging to every bit of clothing as he tried to gather up his mana enough to hold barriers, making his body shudder even as flames burst from the end of his staff. Of all the things Dorian hated about the south, fighting in the snow was definitely his least favourite. Well, that, and maybe the number of strange beasts trying to rip his head off at any given moment, it was really getting hard to decide at this point.

The bitterly cold wind whipped around them, bringing even more snow down as the bright, lumbering red Templars set upon them from all sides, an ambush. It was very clever, really, it had to be to catch all four of them so off guard. Nobody had seen or heard them until they where on top of the party, trying to force them into tight quarters to limit there movement. Cassandra and bull had barely managed to push them back enough to allow for any casting at all, there where a few rough moments where they where almost back to back, pressed tight against the hard edge of a rather nasty drop and a wall of ice that blocked visibility and towered above them.

There was a time Dorian would have assumed they where done for as the enemies clearly had the upper hand and the clang of sword on shield rung out deafeningly, far to close for comfort. Small wonder they hadn't been killed immediately in the initial rush.

He couldn't help but think the inquisitor looked so graceful on his feet in comparison. He put the Mage to shame out here, dancing light on his toes around foes to dig into them from behind with bright, blood soaked blades, the enemy barely seeing it coming before they fell to the ground dead before him. He found it beautiful, in a terrifying whirl wind of death kind of way, watching his lover dodge faster then the Templar could swing his corrupted lyrium sword. He had all the deadly allure of lightning in a storm, a bright flash that would light up any darkness. Unpredictable and wild, bringing awe inspiring dexterity and courage into any encounter.

Darren had always been like that though, frighteningly focused like a wolf circling its prey. It was part of the thrill, the rush, watching him tear through any challenge that lay before him without hesitation. Not that he was ever given much choice mind you, if he faltered, they would all be ground into paste by some angry dragon or pissed off rebel by now.

"How are you doing back there?" Blue eyes flicked back to his companions in the briefest of moments after sending one of them to the ground in a pool of its own blood, only to immediately be replaced by another. They where endless!

"We are holding, but we cannot keep this up forever inquisitor!" Cassandra called, pushing back once more to keep them off the more delicate Mage at the centre.

"How many of them are there?" There's a soft grunt, as the skilled rogue pushed himself onward, quickly becoming fatigued even if they where gaining ground slowly.

"Don't know boss. Cant see a damn thing!" A booming voice comes from the back, the light snowfall and Harsh corners of the terrain making it next to impossible to see where the attacks where coming from, much less guess at there numbers.

"Okay..." the inquisitor thought quickly, trying to decide weather to try to press ahead or fall back, it was clear whey weren't going to break the ambush. "Bull, head back the way we came, clear us a path!"

"You got it, boss."

"Casandra, watch out backs, keep them from overtaking us. Dorian." Blue eyes flicked back to the Mage, knowing his choices here could get all of them killed. "Dorian, I'm going ahead, keep an eye on the seeker."

Dorian gave a nod, turning on his heel to help keep the Templars off them; trusting his best friend, to watch his back. It was still hard though, he wanted to keep the rogues barriers up, keep him just that little bit safer. Stopping the enemy from advancing from behind, bowling them over while they made progress was just as important, if the seeker fell they could be overrun faster then any of them could react, but it still felt wrong to turn his back on the skilled rogue.

"Not having to much fun up there without me?" The Mage called, there push forward being more far quicker then expected as the resistance was crushed by the iron bulls charge and Darren's blades finishing each as they fell to the ground.

"Would I do that?" The playful tone was laced with exhaustion, every moment was draining, this had been going on far to long. Muscles burned, the wind bit, and even he was starting to slow, there was only so much he could take.

The tone didn't escape Dorians notice, and he looked back for just a moment, concentration broken he slipped, falling backwards into the ice with a loud crash. It's a careless mistake, though one easy to make when fatigue sets in. It takes him a moment to scramble back to his feet, and that's all it takes for one of the faster Templars to break past, heading for him while he was still recovering.

"A little help!?" The Mage blocked with his staff, stumbling back again as the sharp steal crashed against the wooden handle. Splinters flew back in his face, being pushed down to one knee just by the sheer force of the blow.

Dorian didn't even have time to brace for a strike before a steal boot flung upon a powerful kick below the staff and into his midriff, knocking him flat on his back with a loud grunt. For a moment the world spun, violent nausea rising and his eyes blurring even as he tried to crawl back onto his knees. He had to get up! He had to get back to his feet before the Templar was back on him. Blurred vision made him stagger, barely able to keep his balance.

Everything came back into sharp focus as the corrupted monster reached him again, barely giving the Mage time to put his arms up in front of his face, he scrunched his eyes shut, awaiting pain that never came.

The shrill clash of steal on steal made his eyes snap open once more.

Darren stood braced hard in front of him, his breaths coming so hard and fast his lover could see his shoulders heave up and down with the effort. There was an uncomfortable grunt, and for a short moment the rouge held firm, able to brace against the full force. The inquisitor wasn't about to watch his lover get cut down here, and he held his guard as long as he could so the Mage could recover his footing. His stand was short lived as blood ran down his scouts coat, staining the faded green to deep purple and landing in heavy droplets onto cold white ground at his feet.

His breath caught, legs shaking, teeth gritted hard to block out the pain. He dared not look down at where the Templars blade had pierced his stomach, he didn't want to know if it had gone right through as his vision narrowed, eyes burning with Unshed tears.

"Kaffas!" Dorian quickly pulled himself up, leaning heavily against his all but broken staff. It groaned under his weight but he quickly regained himself. The Mage was about to pull the fade to his fingertips in a brilliant fireball when the Templar finally threw Darren aside like a rag doll, a rain of blood following the arc of its monstrous fist.

The inquisitor smashed hard into the ground, the loud sound of bones breaking reached his friends ears, only to draw there sights over to the edge. The rogue tried to move, tried to pull himself up and, but his head was so heavy. Breathing sent new waves of agony through him, broken ribs pushing into lungs, and all he could do was grip the crimson snow in between numb fingertips.

"Hold on, Darren!" The young Altus called, hoping he was heard over the heat of battle.

The creature roared, an inhuman scream from someone who once served the order faithfully. Grabbing the dagger lodged in its chest, it yanked it out hard, ripping it clear from its own flesh and flinging it away. The Brilliant stormheart blade landed in the snow just out of reach for the exhausted inquisitor, its cleansing aura fading into nothing beside him. The beast turned its sights back to the now prone form, intending to crush the life out of the defiant body while he was incapacitated.

Light flickered into brilliant burning flame, heat kissing tanned arms as the small blaze heated to an inferno on seconds. As soon as it blistered into life, the Mage sent it hurling towards the red Templar, cursing it even as it fell to the ground with a crash.

Dorian didn't pause to catch his breath, he was already on his way to where his his friend lay before he even knew he was running, skidding to his knees at the mans side. He pulled the body into his arms tightly, looking back to where Casandra and bull where holding back the enemy.

"Dorian!? Get him out of here, we will be right behind you!" She called, seemingly knowing how desperate the situation was even from back there.

"I've got you, Amatus, stay with me." He wasn't even sure if the rogue could hear him, dark eyes scanning for any break in the chain. Any way he could slip out away from the battle to treat what was obviously heavy wounds.

He didn't have time to check, and he didn't have time to second guess himself. The second he sore a way through he lifted his friend up and fade stepped past the Templars, charging through and trying to go unnoticed with the blinding speed of his magic. The surge of mana drained him, made his own wounds ache, but he pushed himself further darting forward again as far as he could, breaking the lines of the enemy and rounding into a small cave he had noticed on the way in. It was small, but sheltered, and Templars where stupid. To stupid, hopefully to follow them in here.

As soon as he felt his body come to a rough stop, his feet slipping a little on the iced ground beneath now utterly destroyed boots, he crouched down, keeping his friend held tightly to his chest.

"Darren?" Now bloody fingertips clasped at the edges of his friends coat, pulling it back to have a better look at the extent of the damage. "Are you still with me, Amatus?" His normally smoothe voice was already pleading, cracking into a helpless sob as he sore the huge, open wound. Deep, jagged, and just under his ribs. Faint breaths barely caused an all to pale chest to rise now.

Desperately those same fingers tapped his friends cheek, watching blue eyes crack open and blink heavily. A small, weak cough erupting from a shuddering chest, sending blood up into his mouth and out onto his lovers chest. Normally Dorian would scold, tease his friend playfully, but right now he was to focused, mind busy honing in on what he had to do to try to stabilise the inquisitor before he bled out in his arms.

"There you are, stay awake Amatus." The exhausted Tevinter Mage reached around his side, grabbing his last remaining potions and carefully pulling his friend up, holding the bottle to wind cracked lips and carefully trying to pour it into his lovers mouth without chocking him. He wasn't sure he could swallow it properly, but he had to try. "Careful." he whispered, as much to himself as the dying rogue.

As soon as it was downed, the Mage lowered Darren's body back to lay in his lap, pushing his hand directly onto the huge gaping wound. The strangled sound that escaped his failing body sent tears into the Dorians eyes. He knew it hurt. He also knew he was getting weaker by the second and wasn't going to last much longer without help.

Tired blue eyes scrunched shut as gentile green healing magic left the mages palm, being directed into the wound to try to knit flesh back together and slow the bleeding.

The Altus cursed himself internally, he wished he knew better healing spells then this one. A mere party trick compared to the finer arts of saving lives that he had left to other mages. He just didn't have a talent for it, but now he wished he had tried harder. Much harder. He wasn't sure for a moment why he didn't read every damn anatomy magic text book in the whole library. Why hadn't he paid attention to solas when the inquisitor crawled out of haven half dead and the elf had managed to help her on her feet in a matter of hours. Why didn't he know more about this? It was frustrating just to think about how much easier this would be if he had just done... something...

Dorian was doing his best to remain calm, not to show his friend the fear he was feeling, but his mask was cracking under the pressure of seeing the inquisitors blood seeping out between his fingers, barely slowed by the magical energy he forced into him. Those bright orbs remained closed, the furrow in his brow slowly loosening as the potion took effect, making him forget for just the shortest of moments that he was so badly wounded.

"Look at me." Dorian pleaded after a moment of stillness, a dread sinking into his very bones and making his hands shake as he tried to work. "Darren, stay awake!"

Tired blue eyes opened again, hazily scanning his friends features thoughtfully. Every muscle ached. Every bone. His own trembling breaths where wracking his chest with agonising spasms, and they where getting harder and more strained with each attempt. He could feel the sticky wet blood that slicked over everything, making his skin all the cooler as it met frosty air. Worst of all though, he was exhausted. Beyond exhausted. His eyes just wanted to close, he just wanted to drift off to sleep. His head was heavy, like a lead weight, as where his arms that hung uselessly at his side, shoulder pressed firmly up against his friends belly, comfortingly warm against the cold outside.

"You have the most stunning blue eyes, did I ever tell you that?" Dorian all but whispered, pressing harder and pushing the magic deeper. It begun to feel calming, warm, dulling the pain of the pressure and letting breathing come just a little easier. "The jewels on the crown of the empress of Orlays can not compare." He wanted the rogue to have something to focus on, something to hold onto to try to keep him from slipping away or giving in to the peaceful draw of the darkness and the promise of the final rest.

It small smile tugged its way across the inquisitors lips, he would have snorted, if he could. The sight of the little smile let Altus relax a little more, settling his nerves. Letting him concentrate on keeping his dearest friend alive and awake.

"You are also an idiot, you know that? This is your own fault after all." The tease covered very real pain, and it just made his friend smile that much more. "Jumping in front of a Templar, getting yourself bloody, it's stupid."

"Dorian..." a breathy voice managed, barely above a whisper.

"No no. I've not done scolding you." Dark eyes sank back down to the gash that was finally starting to slow. He just had to keep him alive until the healers could get to them, hopefully bull and Cassandra would get back to camp, and send for help right away. It would be close, though, even if the bleeding stopped now Darren could still just slip away from the shock alone.

He met the inquisitors gaze again, that little smile still on his lips, he was relaxing. His whole body easing. Tension leaving and pain being dulled by the potion and the magic running through him. At least there was some comfort in it, Dorian wasn't sure how much longer he could bare to see his lover in such agony.

"Your not aloud to do this ever again, you know that?" The Mage leant down, planting a comforting kiss to a cool forehead; delicate, affectionate, a soft caress that shared his fear, his love for the other man who was fighting hard just to hold on. "Festis bei umo canavarum."

A chilled breeze blew in, snaking its way into the little rock crevice and making them both shudder involuntarily. Once more the Mage cursed the south and its damn spiteful weather, sure for a moment that it was like this only to hinder them.

"Cold..." the injured inquisitor mumbled softly, leaning against his friend and taking a shaken breath.

"I know." Dorian carefully moved his arm around his beloved rogue and lifted him in close.

Just that small movement sent a wave of pain up and down the young mans spine, another cough ripped though his chest, the sickening sound of blood gurgling inside his lungs reaching the Mage. He was starting to get fainter now, his eyes loosing focus as he tried to keep them on his lover.

"I'm sorry, Amatus. I'm doing all I can." It was bad, very bad. Dorian was trying his hardest to stay calm, not show how deeply it was tearing into him, but as he wiped the blood from his beloveds chin he it finally hit him sending a tear rolling down the mages cheek no mater how hard he wanted to hold it back

A cool hand reached up, gliding over Dorians check and brushing the stray tear away with his thumb. Darren was always like that, he cared to much about all this. Here he was bleeding to death and he was still worried about his friend. He never thought of himself, not the way the raven haired travinter thought he should.

"It's okay..." the words fell from the rogues lips, strained, weak but still somehow confident in himself. He'd protected his best friend, his lover, the one he had intended to share his life with. It was worth any cost. Even this.

'It's not... it's not okay! I won't let you die in some maker forsaken cave in the middle of nowhere!' Another tear fell from dark eyes. This was wrong, it wasn't supposed to be this way. Darren was the inquisitor, an important man, he shouldn't be the one lying there!

Softly, pale fingertips found there way to dark hair, an understanding and comforting touch. Nothing really mattered, not as long as they had this moment. As long as the rogue could drink in his lovers beautiful face for a little longer. He gave another little smile, it really would be okay.

The sea of blue dulled as Dorian let himself drown in it, he could feel his beloved Amatus loosing his fight. It was over. As much as he didn't want it to be, as much as he wanted to scream and yell and demand the fade to open up give him the power to stop all this, it was over. The travinters heart broke apart, his bloody hand leaving the wound to stroke his friends check, still letting the soothing trickle of magic to flow through him, warming and soothing, easing his friends last moments rather then fighting them.

A deep breath and a comfortable sigh, let the Mage know he was at peace with this. Content in the last little relief he could offer the rogue. Still, his shoulders shook, and it took all of his willpower not to scream, curse the world and the maker, the Templars, the inquisition, everyone for taking this away from him.

"I'm sorry." Dorian cradled Darren closer, quivering lips meeting in a soft goodbye. The blissful call of the fade finally washed over the rogue. Melting into the reassuring kiss and allowing his eyes to drift shut at last.

The last thing he heard before it overtook him was his beloved Mage whispering into his ear.

"I love you, Amatus."

**Author's Note:**

> Entirely the fault of Katha Buh. https://68.media.tumblr.com/8a9a5ab31dded37c3e51c2256da59c34/tumblr_olxnc9yE0h1u2gh3po1_1280.jpg So go over there and check that out!  
>  
> 
> This wasn't gonna be as dark as I wound up making it- haha now if you don't mind I'm off to drown myself in chocolate Icecream! My next fic won't end in death I PROMISE. XD


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